An out-of-shape 19 year old with the beginning of a gut didn't quite pass as a fierce warrior, full armor suit or not."Perhaps I can persuade you to release me this time. I must not be put on trial." There is nothing that will sway me from my sworn duty, treasonous elf." However, brave knight. Put hand on ches- whoops!" Lisa caught herself reading the stage directions and corrected herself by putting her free hand on his costumed chest. "However, brave knight, you must have heard rumours of the unique talents we elves posses." I am in no need of crafted goods. Armor and weapons I have aplenty. Come now, do not tarry with me." I am no smith. The talents I refer to," her hand slid to his groin, "are of a different nature."Derek gasped slightly and had already been hard, but Lisa was not surprised to find him so. He had probably been that way since she walked in the room with her costume. Continuing with this charade was taking longer than she liked, besides thinking the whole thing was. ”Me: (sobbing my heart out, eyes were swollen, nose red) ... I can’t see you anymore.I am not going to let you hurt me like this again!Trainer: It was a sit up. You did one sit up.Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave the house.It’s weird being the same age as old people.Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.Chocolate is God’s way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.It’s probably my age that tricks people into thinking I’m an adult.Marriage Counselor: Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is that true?Him: To be honest, I never knew she sold flowers.Never sing in the shower! Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked. So, remember ... Don’t sing!My wife asked me to take her to one of those restaurants where they make the food right in front of you. So, I took her to Subway and that’s how the fight started.During the middle ages they.
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